Manders Mindset
Hosted by Amanda Russo, The Breathing Goddess, who is a Breathwork Detox Facilitator, Transformative Mindset Coach, and Divorce Paralegal.
Amanda's journey into mindset and empowerment began by working with children in group homes and daycares. She later transitioned to family law, helping people navigate the challenging emotions of divorce. During this time, Amanda also overcame her own weight and health challenges through strength training, meditation, yoga, reiki, and plant medicine.
Amanda also shares her personal journey, detailing how she transformed obstacles into opportunities by adopting a healthier, holistic lifestyle.
Discover practical strategies and inspiring stories that will empower you to break free from limitations and cultivate a mindset geared towards growth and positivity.
Tune in for a fun, friendly, and empowering experience that will help you become the best version of yourself.
Manders Mindset
96: Redesigning Life: Harnessing Small Habits for Personal & Professional Transformation with Megan Bello
After years of feeling stuck in a life that didn't quite fit, Megan discovered the power of small, transformative habits that sparked monumental changes. Join us as she shares her journey from a sales career to thriving in real estate, driven by independence and a zest for life. Megan's story is a vibrant reminder that we all have the tools within us to reshape our lives, starting with the simple act of breathing through challenges and trusting the timing of our paths.
Discover how journaling became a cornerstone of Megan's personal and professional evolution, inspired by the teachings of Rachel Hollis. From quitting smoking and alcohol to purchasing a farm and launching a successful business, Megan's commitment to self-reflection has led to profound life changes. We'll explore how the consistent practice of gratitude and goal-setting not only transformed her mindset but also ignited a newfound respect for authentic love and communication in relationships.
Explore the simplicity and power of anchor habits as Megan and I discuss how manageable changes like 30 minutes of daily movement can set the stage for lasting transformation. With insights on intuitive eating and the importance of patience in health and career growth, this episode encourages embracing "not yet" as a part of our journey. As we reflect on personal growth through authenticity and courage, listeners are reminded of their capacity to effect meaningful change, one small habit at a time.
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Anchor yourself in one habit and trust what's yours is already on the way to you. In this episode, we dive deep into the power of small habits, the magic of trusting life's timing, and how shifting your mindset can unlock and create meaningful change in your life. Now let's get into the episode.
Speaker 2:Welcome to the Manders Mindset Podcast. Here you'll find both monologue and interviews of entrepreneurs, coaches, healers and a variety of other people where your host, Amanda Russo, will discuss her own mindset and perspective and her guest's mindset and perspective on the world around us. Manders and her guests will help explain to you how shifting your mindset will shift your life.
Speaker 1:Welcome back to Manders Mindset. I'm your host, amanda Russo, and I am here today with Megan, and Megan is fulfilling her lifelong dream of owning a real estate brokerage and being a managing broker. She's an asset to the community with her abundant, transparent and professional approach to real estate. Aside from helping agents reach their dreams and making sure her customers' needs and goals are met or exceeded, she loves to spend time with her family and animals on her farm. She is a sixth-generation native with a passion for helping people and real estate agents reach their highest and best self through real estate self through real estate and Megan and I connected by touching upon Rachel Hollis and how she's helped us progress further into our development and healing journeys, and we're going to touch upon that and all of Megan's story. Thank you so much for joining me.
Speaker 3:Thank you for having me. I'm glad we could get this on the books and done and we were able to connect Me too.
Speaker 1:So that's an awesome bio, but who would you say Megan is at the core?
Speaker 3:Oh man, fiery yeah, I mean I haven't heard the bio read out loud was like man. I definitely edited that. Well, I'm glad I took the time in that piece, because I usually don't write like that that was good, at least it just happened. Reading it now for now. Now I've got it covered and now I've got an audio and I'm off to the races so you say you're fiery at the core.
Speaker 3:Yes, I just think that things can be done Like I don't know. I feel like fiery in like an imperturbable optimist sort of way, but also, and the fiery discs and sort of get you into trouble as well I've found in my life. But yes, fiery in both of the sense, good and bad.
Speaker 1:I like that things can be done. You know like there's a way, there's a way to figure everything out. You know, I read a book that I loved called Everything is Figureoutable, and I say that all the time. You know like there's a way to do the thing. Whatever the thing is, even if plan A, b, c, d doesn't work there's E, b, c, d doesn't work.
Speaker 3:There's E Every time. As long as you're still alive and breathing, you can execute, create or make any plan you want.
Speaker 1:You can do anything you know and if you can think of it and imagine it, then it is possible. So yeah, absolutely. I love how you said as long as you're breathing. I'm a breathwork facilitator and something I always say is as long as you have your breath, you've got options. Once you stop breathing, that's when you don't have options. Everybody chuckles at that. But if you're breathing, you've got all the options in the world. Something's not working. Breathe into something else.
Speaker 3:Yep, absolutely, and don't say places that you feel like you don't need to say, even through obligation. I feel like that was where I was a lot and in 2019, they had built a life. That was sort of the obligation piece. I met and married a man that my family approved of, but I never even asked myself, I didn't even know what I wanted. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So yeah, Now, before we get into 2019, can we backtrack a little bit? Can you take us down memory lane? Tell us a little bit about upbringing your family, dynamic childhood, how deep you want to go?
Speaker 3:Yeah, in my bio I'm sixth generation to Colorado. My kids are seven. I grew up in Aurora and Parker area. I graduated high school a year and a half early.
Speaker 3:I got into sales right away. First off I was working under the table for the Vietnamese restaurant locally and I would sell their sauces at the farmer's market and I killed it. And I got a job when I was 17, after I graduated high school, straight commission selling hair straighteners at the mall. If you're from Colorado Park Meadows Mall, which is a brutal sales job, gotta get him down. She's like you'll be really good at this.
Speaker 3:And then I got that job and I once I figured out sort of like the freedom that you had when you could control what you made. I liked that a lot and figured that I would get into sales just in general. So I worked kind of kiosk sales for a while and then I ended up connecting with the owner of famous dates barbecue at the time and working a catering job. I created a sales job for them for their catering division in the metro area and then I got a real estate license in 2000,. October 2015 was when it was official. So that was when I got into the business and I was young. I was 21 and ready to take on the world and drive a bmw or something I don't know and now, when did?
Speaker 3:you get married. Oh, man, I've been married. So the first time was 14 in june. That was my first that I was actually talking to my love of my life's husband about it the other day. There was a lot of drama at that wedding. If you ever want to, if, if you've man, I was just. I had a very traditional big wedding and we just it wasn't like I said.
Speaker 3:I kept having, like I just felt like I would get to this place of like growth or whatever, and like I didn't, I always would feel kind of very like isolated, like the person I was with wasn't who I was supposed to be with, and so I met in 2014 and I, thank goodness, divorced. Then I'm divorced and married again and not married. I got married then in 2018. And then I was separated in 2019 because, like I said, same state twice and I think it was just mostly I had had my parents were together my entire childhood and they actually divorced when I was 25, when I was married to my second husband. And I'm not it's not my parents fault that I got divorced. I don't mean that like I didn't force me or anything. I do think that because I didn't know what a healthy marriage looked like I was just like let's get married and that was it, like there was no, nothing else. So like when you continually involve the government in your affairs. You know it takes a lot of time and money and assets, but you do learn. I was telling my husband the other day I'm like you get the benefit of it all because, like I have been married. I mean June 2014 would have been my 10 year wedding anniversary. So you have, you've only been married to me for three years, but I have. I've done the time. You know that's gained me experience and I think, too, I have a unique perspective because I can totally tell, like when my husband and I are maybe disagreeing about something, I'm also older too. Like my fragile love is more developed and fully developed at 30, I hope that I just can. You know what I mean. Like I've been married a couple of times before.
Speaker 3:Like you don't get so mad about your husband not doing the dishes, you know what I mean. Like when it's your third one, you're just like, yeah, man, don't, it's fine, right? You know what I mean. Or because, honestly, if I had a man who was great at doing the dishes, that's who I would have married. And to me, I don't care if you want to do the dishes. You know what I mean. And I see, for example, like my mom kept a really clean house her mom keeps an immaculate house super clean like you can eat off the floor, sort of thing. I am a horrible housewife. I just I'm a excellent cook, but like I need to hire that shit out, I can't do all of it. So, instead of having this really unreasonable expectation on myself that I'm going to be this great housewife, I'm just going to be who I am, you know. I think that was the biggest part of that.
Speaker 3:And being married doesn't shackle you from learning. There's a lot of narrative out there. It's like you've got to be alone. If you're alone for eight months, boop, you'll meet the love of your life. Like there's some sort of formula to aloneness, to love, and it doesn't make any sense to me at all, because you definitely, let me tell you, be married to the wrong person twice. There's lots of lessons there. You can really grow as a person. So, yeah, that's my little bit of backstory.
Speaker 3:Then I met my now husband in 2020 and we have been married. It will be three years. I started crying It'll be three years of January because, like I can't believe I love him so much. My last two marriages hit my first wedding anniversary and I was like I cannot do that again and we were divorced shortly after. So, like, I'm in my third wedding and I loved it, like I love him so much. So I feel very happy and that too.
Speaker 3:I failed my way to success there. I didn't have good marriages, they weren't great. Twice I mean, go my God, hitting up your divorce attorney that many times at that age. And then you know. But I failed until I got it and I'm really confident and happy that I, like, got it.
Speaker 3:Now I can't tell the future, but I know that I'm in a relationship with someone and it's very clear. It's easy to be resentful, but I choose. This is the person that I've chose and when your life is what you've chosen and designed, you kind of treat it and take care of it better. Anyway, I'm not the same wife I was to my husband now as I was to my ex-husband. I didn't love my ex-husband the middle one but I do feel bad that I married and spent a lot of time with somebody that I truly didn't love and cherish. I was more harsh and judgmental and there was more of these dynamics that I had pulled in from what I was raised around versus what I actually thought and wanted. You know what I mean, because you're like if you're not intentional on what you want, you just get what you're used to, and if you're used to dysfunction, that's what you're going to keep getting.
Speaker 1:So you mentioned you made the same mistake twice. What same mistake was that marrying wrong?
Speaker 3:Marrying someone, that it wasn't me calling the shots, it wasn't me who said this is the man I want. Like it was like, well, what does my mom want, what does my grandma want? And I didn't realize it. Like when I say it now, it sounds well, you should have known. Like I didn't realize that was the problem. I hadn't, honestly, keep getting married and coming to these specials and being like, oh my god, I hate this, why am I still here and kind of seeing, seeing those. So the same mistake twice, I think was just, you know, he makes money, he takes care of me. Oh, he does this. Because I think that was a lot of what my mom had told herself about my dad. My mom, he doesn't beat me, right, but like, okay, but we shouldn't be married, right, there's two. That's not it. Those are the two options, right, like domestic violence or marriage. Like fortunately and you know, a lot of this is also time too like it's only been 50 years today when we could get their own line of credit without a male signature. You know. So there's a lot of things at play here.
Speaker 3:That's what I think that was, and not that my ex-husbands are necessarily bad people. Like I don't wish anything harm on them. I don't think like we were mad. We had some, some nests and horses and some words, both of them sorry, but like it's fine. I don't think like we were mad. We had some, some nests and horses and some words both of them Sorry, but like it's fine.
Speaker 3:Like I don't hold any like overarching resentment because at the end of the day, if we were supposed to be together, we'd still be together. You know what I mean. Like we obviously were supposed to learn from each other for a reason, so like but thank God we don't have to be married anymore. Like, and God we don't live in that time where I would have been forced to stay with you Like I could. And honestly, real estate has been such a wonderful career for me because think about the privilege to be able to afford to get divorced twice. Like that's hard and expensive. You know what I mean. To be able to have the freedom and the ability to actually be like no, I'm just going to change my mind again, change your name to be able to do all that is huge. So yeah, that's sort of what I mean with this mistake twice and then just learning from those mistakes who weren't really truly where you find your power.
Speaker 1:I think I like how you mentioned you failed your way to your to success. You know I never heard anybody talk about that in terms of relationships but and with everything that's so true you know, and I used to be a divorce paralegal for four years. So like I get the, even the mental turmoil. It's pricey and you know, so many people stay even outside of the priciness of divorce because of that security, like you mentioned, and even besides your mom society for so long emphasized, like you wanted me to take care of you. So, like you but there's more than that, like thank thanks for the help.
Speaker 3:Do I love you like genuinely, you know do I like enjoy you and respect you and like honestly and I'm not saying this is like his fault or my fault or anybody's fault, but like I didn't respect my ex-husband at all like we probably, when we got engaged, we probably should open up. Like I remember sitting in therapy and he would be like she doesn't tell me things and I'd be like I don't want to, but we should break up like why didn't someone hit me in the head? And you know what I mean. But like with my husband now I want to come to him, of course, I want to tell you things. Like it's so in a lot of ways he was right. My ex-husband would complain about me as a wife, and he was right.
Speaker 3:And to realize that and to be like, oh, my God, maybe I am a bad wife, but maybe I'm not a bad person and I could be a bad wife and a good person and I could be a bad wife because of what's done and what's happened before you know what I mean and how I'm like, how I'm placing things and maybe my expectations, because that's all it was is I was like, oh, maybe this person will be the life that I want. When I switched this mindset after you know, october 2019, when I started the general practice, and then in March 2020, I was like I'm done, I'm done like I'm. This is how I'm now, this is what I used to do and here's how I'm doing it now. I used to expect this or accept this from people and I won't accept this anymore, you know, and then kind of just go from there Sorry, there's, my son is seven months and back there yelling.
Speaker 1:Now. So what's the journal practice you started in October 2019?
Speaker 3:So the journal practice you started in October 2019?. So the journal practice was Rachel Hollis. I think it is called the dream journal. She had you write five things you're thankful for, and then it was 10. This is what she does. She had done I think she probably still does do it, but this was her and she sold the journals and it was around October 2019. And I was like I'm ready to get my poopy group, like let's get this together. So I started writing five the five affirmate or five gratitudes, and 10 goals, and I have been doing that every day since so it's been like over 1850 days now.
Speaker 3:I haven't done every day. We're not perfect, you know I've had been sick or gone, had issues, but I've've always picked it up back again Like it's always just been. It was like that sort of one thing that I was like, okay, I can wake up every day and write what I'm thankful for and I could be focused on what I want, and just doing that alone will bring my goals to me. So with the journal, I have quit smoking cigarettes, I quit drinking alcohol, I bought my own farm, I built my own company, I've made various income goals, I have had different relationship shifts and different things, and it's just every day that I still do it. So my journal's now green for money now. But yeah, I that, that's what I started and it's been pretty crazy to crazy, like to have a habit goal this long.
Speaker 1:I've never had anything that I've really done this long other than like being in my industry so it was ironic to me that you discovered and started working with her modalities around October 2019, because it was around the same time for me.
Speaker 1:I had heard about her five to thrive. Do you know of those? It sounds familiar, but remind me because, like I said, so like the five things she recommends doing every day. One of them is like the gratitude or like the journal. And then one was like moving your body for 30 minutes, half your body weight in ounces of water, waking up an hour earlier and spending that time for you and giving up one one thing each month. That isn't good for you. And like it was the last 90 days of the year and I discovered that I don't think it was the very October 1st, but that's what was the start of my fitness journey with the 30 minutes of movement every single day because I was like I can do 30 minutes of some type of movement, even if it's walking, even if it's whatever, like it doesn't have to be.
Speaker 1:I didn't even have a gym membership. I never even stepped into a gym, like I didn't even know anything about that, but I was like I can move and it changed so much for me and then I assume you kept it going through 2020.
Speaker 3:Then as well, right, like in the world.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I did. It was really what was a big catalyst for me, because it was something that was simple. You know, I think so many people start off these new habits or these new goals and they have it. It's so complicated and it's like, oh, mind doesn't want to do it, it has that to notice, just feeling less out of breath, you know, and it was something so simple.
Speaker 3:Yep, and I think it's interesting too because as I'm like taking notes as well to refer back to, like that it was the five to thrive. It wasn't the gratitude journal. I just picked the gratitude journal because I said I'm not going to do all of that, like that's what it was, because I was like I need to do something. That's foolproof and we don't change. You don't just wake up one day and be able to do a full routine and then like so many times, oh, I didn't move today, I'm just not going to do move tomorrow. Like what is that? You don't do it again. But especially like with my agents when I'm coaching them and stuff too, it's very much like what is your anchor habit? Cause you can't change six habits at one time. You have to change them one at a time. So what's your anchor habit? My anchor habit is my journal. For another reason, it might be like reading for a minute. Well, actually, after I started my journal, I started the journal October 2019, when I quit smoking cigarettes in January 2020. I had a lot of time on my hands, so then I put reading so that I would do journal and reading, and, like I had been reading every morning anyway, I had started reading in the morning when I was in production and sales in 2016 in real estate. Waking up and having a morning routine and reading wasn't crazy to me, but doing it, but writing the gratitudes and then reading, and I read 70 books in 2020. Self-help and business, and it was just like you just got to keep going. And so then you know, I don't read 70 books. Now I have 12 agents and two kids and got a construction project coming on and like a bunch of other things those habits too, and that's another thing too. I choose to not beat myself up over the fact that I don't read 70 books a year. Like, if you're beating yourself up, chances are you're just going to do that. So if you're beating yourself up, stop. Don't beat yourself up with what you're doing. Change how you're speaking to yourself first, because you can't beat yourself into changing. You have to like, like, love yourself into that. I mean, I'm looking at my book. So since the beginning of year one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, I'll probably read 13 to 14 books this year. That's a vast difference than 70. But, like, when I read 70 books, I had literally like I was gone through my second divorce and it was me and my dogs and my farm and selling real estate. So, like, that's all I did do was read books. It was COVID guys. Like, of course I read books.
Speaker 3:I'm sure you drink your water and do what you need to do, because you did it, but in your brain the only one thing you executed was moving 30 minutes and that's, if you remembered it, that's what changed your life and that's why Rachel Hollis has been so, I think, great in like how she's sold her books and kind of how she's helped with self-help, because there's definitely a little bit judgmental about her life too. But like she simplifies it, it's the truth, right, if you simplify the truth and you make it, you can use that. Yes, people will like it's not, Rachel Hollis didn't invent self-help. She fails just like all of us do. You know what I mean. But I liked how she cause. You know, out of all those things, even if you take any of those things waking up 30 minutes earlier but you don't necessarily move or you don't necessarily do gradually that will also change your life. You know, if you give up one thing a month, that will change your life, even if you just take them on their own.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, I love everything you said there and I love how you mentioned the anchor habit. You know, because that was something she really got into. My head was like you can't change everything at once. You know, it was middle of October. I actually joined a gym and I'll never forget.
Speaker 1:I started working with a trainer and he's like, oh, we need to come up with this meal plan and this and that. And I'm like, buddy, I'm not doing that. And I was like, listen, buddy, I'm not doing that. And I was like, listen, we're not doing that. And he was like you're not gonna see success, you're not gonna have progress, you're not gonna lose weight. I was like, listen, you realize, I have never meal prepped, I have never trapped food, I don't even know what the hell the macro is. You think I'm just gonna start tracking macros, because I entered the gym now and I tell you I have this, that's not gonna go, that's not gonna work. And I was like, listen, I'll talk to you in three months.
Speaker 1:And in three months I lost 32 pounds. And I was like I'm not, I didn't do all the crazy shit, you know. And I kind of want to say like we'll roast a little bit who like give up one thing to be like more of a positive aspect, and I tried adding in like something positive, and for me that was even just more protein, whatever type of protein. I wasn't tracking it because, like more protein is something I kind of knew, not even knowing a lot about nutrition, couldn't help me and would likely help me, so I'd add in more meat and it was just adding in something good, you know, and I think that was a big catalyst for what helped me have the long lasting change. You know, like there had been other times in my life that, oh, I lost a couple, like lost 15 pounds, but would gain it back, you know, whereas this, it was much more sustainable because you're not focusing on everything.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Then you're like oh, I didn't do that and I think the hustle culture kind of does a lot of that like every day, and that's also like you have to understand too, masculine versus feminine energy. Like we're just different creatures, we're're different people. Like that was a big shift in 2019 too, was I just realized? Like look, I am not like my male counterparts. I might be kind of a dude when it comes to business and I might be able to duke it out with the rest of them or whatever, but like I'm a female and I wake up different every single day and I'm on a 28 day cycle, like, as much as I want to fit in with the dudes, that's just where, where my body is. And just like my male counterpart, she wakes up to say every day he's really confused why I am so different every day. That seems odd to him, you know. So like it's kind of just like, okay, so if I have this habit and that's what's nice about the journal the journal doesn't have to be in there before am the journal can be done at noon or at one, or if you forget and you pick it up or whatever. Like there's and we know our differences, right, that's. This is just getting to know ourselves.
Speaker 3:Are you blowing off your alarm because you're exhausted and be in need to rest? Then you should rest. Are you blowing up your alarm because you're trying to avoid something right Like that we can't. You know what I mean. But sometimes, like our bodies and, like I said, especially with the female energy, it goes up and down all the time. We have a week where we're on top of the world and then the next week is the you know, the worst, and that's actually a wonderful creative energy and we can use it and that doesn't negate us for being in business.
Speaker 3:I would even argue that it gives us a place because of that ability to harness that big, long cycle of energy and learning how to do it. Like my ability to work and get things done and delegate has just gotten so much better just because I like know what I understand. I'm not trying to do it all myself. You know like this is what I am and this is what I need, and I'm going to need support in these other ways because I don't show up the same every day. So what can I show up and do or what do I need to like delegate and what makes sure that I'm like, centered and knowing what I need to know, and that's the journal you want your gratitude to what you're focused on Like. Those are the things you should always have banging around in your head, right.
Speaker 1:So what would you say? The journal practice helped you achieve the most, like the biggest accomplishment.
Speaker 3:There's not like a probably the biggest one. I got my own, I have my own farm. Now I would do things like, I would write around like I am connected and respected, and then I would be like, okay, I'm gonna meet like, and then I would meet people that will connect me. It was just like little things and shifts that I just wanted to work on in my consciousness and knew I was because the biggest, probably the biggest groundbreaking thing would be the smoking, because I had smoked since I was 17 and I was like a pack a day smoker.
Speaker 3:I wasn't like oh my god, I'm gonna have a cigarette. My friends don't want to smoke. I'm like a chimney or a train, especially when I would have a glass of wine. It was all night. I loved smoking, but I'm not a smoker. Like it's weird, could be both.
Speaker 3:I remember looking as I would smoke a cigarette and be like I will never be able to get you up, like I just didn't think I could do it. Then I tried, I had to try, I would try, I would throw away my cigarettes. You know I probably would quit. If you're a smoker who's trying to quit, you probably try to. Was this time was I had picked a date, which I had done before, and then it's like it was January 3rd, because my birthday is January 2nd, so like who wants to do resolutions on your birthday lane. So the last time I spoke it was my birthday and, yeah, I picked a date. And then I had been writing in my journal already in October. Right, so I just started writing I'm not a smoker. And then after a while it was hell of a few days. But then, after you just get used to writing it, you just realized I'm not a smoker anymore. Like you did. The urge went away. Every time I had quit before it had been like I was trying to force myself to not want to quit, and this time I had just already become someone who didn't smoke. So being able to see myself change something that I didn't think I could change just everything since then has been different, because now I just changed.
Speaker 3:When I quit smoking, I met my husband. I quit drinking alcohol. We moved to a beautiful farm in Longmont where we raised and loved on his two kids. I, my daughter, was born there. We had a beautiful like farm wedding, like it's just been. It's been pretty incredible. What you get when you quit things is also just as much as sometimes as you get when you do things right, like you said, when you quit smoking cigarettes, as if you, but then you pick up the book too right, like those aren't the same but they're like two sides of the same thing, and then I think that was also it too, being like having something to replace it with. Like I said, when I want to smoke and I go read a book or something.
Speaker 1:Can you say that again about when you quit things? I loved that comment.
Speaker 3:When you quit things it can be the same as when you like add things on, like the quitting and the reading were like two sides of the same coin for replacing it out. But quitting, putting something down is just as powerful as picking something up.
Speaker 1:Loved that, gem Loved that, and I love how you mentioned also like replacing it with something else. Like that, I think, is really key. You know, that's something that's even kind of a different aspect, but I even did in terms of food, instead of giving up xyz, replacing it with something else. You know, because our minds, if we tell ourselves we can't have x, you want that, just because it's psychology, it's like you can't have the thing. Even back to when you were a kid, like mom says you can't have the candy bar, you want that candy bar even more because she said you can't have it right.
Speaker 3:Well, and I too, I I didn't have like specific weight loss, but I had like some sort of things that I wanted to be able to fit into and whatnot that I do, I did I didn't want to diet because I didn't keto and stuff before, like I said, that really forceful forcing. I didn't want to do that anymore. So instead and it wasn't because I didn't have a ton like I don't talk about it because it wasn't like a weight loss journey, like people are like what are you talking about?
Speaker 3:like I know I'm not like saying that I'm like a weight loss person, I have a high metabolism, like I know, um, but I, I would eat. If it was healthy, I would eat two servings if I was hungry and then if it was unhealthy, I would try to eat a half serving instead. So like trying to make like that conscious decision of okay, I'm going to enjoy what I want, but I'm going to eat a half of what I should, because I'm still going to get the sweet and then I'm not going to get all the extra calories. And then there's something that I do want to eat, because and that was going off of intuitive eating so if I craved it, so if I wanted fish, what kind of fish do I want? What do I want to eat? Okay, great Fish, I can have a lot of, so I can eat as much fish as I want. So I'm ordering sushi. All a bunch of sushi, right?
Speaker 1:No, I gotcha. Yeah, that you know, and I think it's helpful to like just not have the mindset that you're restricting, you know. And also even kind of what something you said made me think of. You know, I tried the to lose 50 pounds. I'm going to lose this.
Speaker 1:It was finally this time around that I was just like I don't have any specific number goals, you know. And even that same post in Otrano was like how much weight do you want to lose? And I'm like I don't know, like she's like what do you mean? You don't know. And I'm like, listen, I want to look better, I want to feel better, like that's where I'm starting. I'm not starting with I have to lose this much weight by this date. I don't want to look the way I look, I don't want to feel the way I feel. That's where I'm at, you know.
Speaker 1:And I think there's got to be a balance with goals, with how specific you are, because sometimes we can get so attached to I didn't get this by X date, you know, whereas I lost 32 pounds in three months because I had no timeline for it. I had never seen that much of a weight loss journey, but every other time I said it's going to happen by this date or it's going to be this much by this month, and it's like we put this pressure on ourselves, you know, and then we almost set ourselves up for the disappointment if it doesn't happen. But it's. What difference does it make if you lose the weight by December 31st versus if you lose the weight by February 20, 29th, like you?
Speaker 3:still did it right, and I think just understanding too, like there is a better, higher power than us, like we are not just here on our own and understanding, okay, if it's not happening now, there's a better timing in being okay with that timing and being okay with the timing of your life, because what I've been finding, too, is the answer is not necessarily no. Oftentimes the answer is not yet. So many times that I thought I missed out on something and then I just got it later and then I look like such a dweeb because I was so buttered I didn't get it.
Speaker 1:I just wasn't patient Happened to me in a lot of areas of life. You know I do the journal myself as well and even like for the longest time. I had always wanted to work in a law office as a paralegal and I had different law offices not give me the job because of not having experience. And something I always wrote was I work full time in the law office because then I finally got an opportunity, but it was a part time position. I was so mad. I was mad at the world. I was like they didn't give me the full time position, that they gave it to somebody else, and it was a year later that I then got offered a full time position and a different area of law that I liked even better. And it was like Amanda, it just it wasn't right. Yet it's not that it wasn't for you, it's just not right now.
Speaker 3:Not right now Exactly and like you wouldn't. If what you had worked, if what you had wanted would have worked out, you wouldn't have necessarily been you where you had been. If I would have been like I really when I got to real estate, I really wanted to be rookie of the year, really wanted to sell a bunch of real estate. I wanted to be this like whiz kid that just sold a bunch of houses. It's not how real estate works, especially when you're young. When you get licensed young, you gotta it's two years, no matter who you are. It takes a minute and then like if when you're young, you have to like build it up. I just wish I would have known. If I would have been that rookie of the year, top producing agent, would I have opened my own company? Would things have gone the way they have been like this? I'm now so confident and it took time to do this. It's not like you're not hitting the head of my God or something. I just decided that I was going to live a life, that this was divine timing, this was the way it's supposed to happen and it will happen for me and as long as I keep my eye on the prize and I have faith that it's going to happen, it's all going to come out and work into fruition and realizing too. I just celebrated my nine years in real estate on the 19th of October and, like nine years ago, I said I will open my own business. I will open my own real estate brokerage and the likelihood of that happening. From when you're in real estate school.
Speaker 3:Everybody says that less than 1% of people do open a company. Actually, only 8% of people who get licensed are in the business in two years producing and making money, much less going on and opening a business. I'm not affiliated with any major corporation. I'm not a Keller Williams team or a Colville thinker Remax. I am my own motion homes group, independently owned by me, running in my room, because I don't want corporations to be running my industry like they shouldn't.
Speaker 3:It should be the agents, the individuals, and they're just realizing that, while I feel like and I know I have so much to go ahead of me being so thankful and grateful for that vision that I had nine years ago, that I'm here now because if I would have sold a bunch of houses, maybe I wouldn't have gotten into management, you know, because that would have been a lot of money and a lot of time. It would have taken a ton of time away from me and it's taken time for me to build this business. Just understand that your life is divine timing. You being aware that it's divine timing or not doesn't change the fact that it is.
Speaker 1:You mentioned you started smoking at 17. How old were you when you stopped? Like, how long did you smoke?
Speaker 3:for 26, so nine, oh shit, okay, that's a long time yes, yes, and I was a very cool teenager, that was my tongue and my tongue was like going black. I was like it's time for me to let that go and I think that's one of the hardest things for us to do, because, no matter what, that cigarette was always there and for me to break up with it and be like I don't need you to live my life Like it hurts, but I got it. You know, like, and that's just such an empowering thing to see. Cause, like I said, when I go to the store now and I see them and oh my God, cigarettes are $11 a pack Like I would have been forced to quit, let me tell you, when I quit, it was only like $6. And I thought that was ridiculous. I think I paid as much as they were now on like a resort in Hawaii once or something like that. Very expensive now. But yeah, that's one of the best things you can ever do is quit.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love how you mentioned that about Quentin. Sometimes it's even more powerful or just as powerful. And keeping the faith in the divine timing backlash about the fact that I was looking to talk about her and people disagreeing with her and some of her beliefs, mindset, whatever. And you know, one of the biggest things I try to emphasize in terms of all these public figures in the self-help realm is take what works for you. Take what resonates with you. Is she perfect? No, especially these famous people. They've got their baggage. We've all done our shit, but even more so in the public eye. If she has a gem or a nugget or somebody has a gem or a nugget that works with you, take it and run with it Like who cares that. It's her that mentioned last 90 days. You know, I listened to a Mel Robbins podcast and she talked about the benefits of setting your goals starting in September. Okay, she didn't call it last 90 days, but it's the same fucking concept, Right? So take what resonates with you.
Speaker 3:Exactly, I'm so triggered by Rachel Hollis and the fact that she got divorced that you can't listen to her mindset, then read another author. The point is to get better, right, like it's fine, I don't know. Like I said, I haven't really cause, I just sort of read overall. You know what I mean. And Rachel Hollis has really great books that are awesome to read and are affordable, like they're great and they're accessible and I think they help. So I think this is a great topic to have and a little controversy never hurt anybody.
Speaker 1:I completely agree. I had a few people even message me privately like she thinks she's better than everybody and it's like I feel like a lot of famous people do. A lot of people in general do. You know, a lot of people in general do, but even more so these people that are famous, making all this money, doing all these things. Okay, yeah, they have some egotistical shit, but if there's something that she says, if somebody says and it helps you progress, take it and run with it. You know, let us shift you, yeah.
Speaker 3:I was like I don't have a personal relationship with Rachel Hollis, right, but I think there's a lot of value to be said of writing down five goals and 10 parentheses. That's huge. So, and if you, like you said, take what resonates like you're like, like all the cool kids say, I don't know.
Speaker 1:You know, I even say that with me. Like, listening to the podcast, you might not agree with everything I say, but like, if I say something that resonates with you and could help you, fuck it, use it, and if you don't like the rest, leave it. Take what works, pick it up and leave the rest for somebody else, absolutely. Thank you so much for speaking with me. I loved this. Thank you so much for having me, of course. Now, have you heard of a man named Jay Shetty? I have, so he's like a monk. Yes, so he's got a podcast called On Purpose and he ends it with two segments and I end mine with the same. First one is the many sides to us, five questions, and they've got to be answered in one word, each A. What is one word someone who was meeting you for the first time would use to describe you as?
Speaker 3:Tall.
Speaker 1:What is one word that someone who knows you extremely well would use to describe you as?
Speaker 3:I don't want to use fiery again. Someone who knows me well probably kind.
Speaker 1:What is one word you'd use to describe yourself Focused? What is one word that, if someone didn't like you or agree with your mindset, would you use to describe you as Bitchy? What is one word you're embodying right now Abundance. Then the second segment is the final five, five questions, and they can be answered in up to a sentence. What is the best advice you've heard or received?
Speaker 3:We're all dying anyway. We can't take it when you go. You know like.
Speaker 1:Why is that the best advice?
Speaker 3:Because we're just here temporarily, so we shouldn't be afraid of doing anything.
Speaker 1:I love that. What is the worst advice you've heard or received?
Speaker 3:I wonder what X or so-and-so will think about this.
Speaker 1:It doesn't matter. What is something that you used to value that you no longer value?
Speaker 3:Being close to like cities, like that sort of thing.
Speaker 1:If you could describe what you would want your legacy to be if someone was reading it, what would you want it to say?
Speaker 3:That I would hope that everybody I loved always lives so fearlessly and authentically at their highest and best self, so fearlessly and authentically at their highest and best self.
Speaker 1:If you could create one law in the world that everyone had to follow, what would it be?
Speaker 3:Oh, no one would be able to lie. It would be great. Why would that be your law? The world would fall apart. Oh, everybody lies all the time. To us, it's great. That's why the truth is so powerful, because that that's fair.
Speaker 1:Well, thank you so much. I really appreciate you speaking with me. And now, where can the listeners connect with you?
Speaker 3:I am online. My website is motionhomesgroupcom. I have a motion homes group facebook page. I'm on instagram megan bello 0102 and I'm also megan bello on facebook. Send me a friend request. I still have some available and, as always, I'm available on my cell phone at 720-393-0673.
Speaker 1:Awesome. I will put all of that in the show notes and I do like to give it back to the guests. Do you have any final words of wisdom? Anything you want to leave the listeners with, you can do anything that you can imagine.
Speaker 3:Just get it done and don't. What people think about you is none of your business.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for joining me.
Speaker 3:Yes, I appreciate you.
Speaker 1:I thought we could do this now and thank you, guys for tuning in to another episode of Mando's Mindset. Hey guys, mando's here with some key takeaways from my impactful conversation with Megan. Megan and I emphasized the importance of anchoring in on one habit, embracing a simple grounding habit every single day, whatever that is, whether it's gratitude, movement and something that you can do no matter what the circumstances are. And this habit is something that will keep you focused and steady, to stay the course. Me, for example. I knew I could get 30 minutes of movement in every day, even if, god forbid, that was me walking around my apartment at the time for 30 minutes. What is that habit for you that you confidently can do every day?
Speaker 1:Also, we emphasize the importance of divine timing and trusting that what's meant for you will come at the right time, even if it doesn't happen right away. Sometimes no means not right now. It doesn't mean never. Having patience with your goals is really important, because if you don't achieve it on the first time, are you going to stop and give up? No, you want to keep pushing forward and they might take time to come into fruition, but that doesn't mean it's not going to happen. Failure is when you stop. Failure is not if it doesn't happen, if you don't achieve the goal right away, failure is stopping, because then you're never going to achieve the goal. And we also emphasized about gratitude and visualization. Focusing on gratitude and visualizing 10 goals really helped Megan stay committed and conquer her challenges. It helped her quit smoking after nine years. And gratitude is a great place to start, because something I always say is we all have something to be grateful for. If you're listening to me right now, you have internet, you have the ability to hear what I'm saying, you have the ability to listen to a podcast, whether it's on Apple, spotify, overcast whatever your platform of choice is or if you're watching me visually. Not everybody, even in other countries, have that luxury. Again, there's always something to be grateful for, and I think that's a really great place to start, because it's like the quote from Tony Robbins you can't be angry and grateful simultaneously. It just doesn't work, you know. So your life is bound to improve and your mindset is bound to shift if you focus on gratitude. So I encourage you. If you are torn or not sure what that one habit should be, let it be gratitude. When Megan shifted her perspective, to embrace gratitude and have patience and trust the process, she found herself better able to handle all of life's challenges that it started to throw at her. And lastly, I really hope this is the main thing you guys take away from everything I have ever said to you.
Speaker 1:A few people were a little surprised that I was looking to record a podcast discussing some of the modalities that Rachel Hollis used and talked about, because some people have their mixed feelings about her. Some people have their mixed feelings about me. As I always say, you're not for everybody and neither am I. But here's the deal Take the gems that resonate with you and leave the rest.
Speaker 1:If me talking about shifting your mindset, it sounds stupid as fuck to you. Don't think about shifting your mindset. Hell, maybe rephrase the words Whatever works for you to help you progress and move the needle forward, do that. It all comes back. We're here, then we're not. So take what I say that resonates with you and use it. Use it to breathe into new life and the shit that I say that you're like this chick is batshit crazy. Don't listen to it. Keep going.
Speaker 1:There will be so many people in your life whether it's famous people, friends, colleagues that you don't agree with everything they say, and if you did, it would be boring. We don't all with everything they say, and if you did, it would be boring. We don't all want to be the same, so take what works, what helps you shift internally, and anything that doesn't make sense, leave it. Well, thank you guys for tuning in to another episode of mander's mindset, and I would appreciate it if you'd leave me a rating, leave a review on Apple Podcasts, positive or negative. I'd love to hear your thoughts and share this episode with anyone you think would benefit from it. Thanks guys, until next time. In case no one told you today, I'm proud of you, I'm booting for you and you got this, as always. If you enjoyed the show, I would really appreciate it if you would leave me a five-star rating, leave a review and share it with anyone you think would benefit from this. And don't forget you are only one mindset. Shift away from shifting your life. Thanks guys, until next time.
